How to Manage Stress
Stress - what causes it?
school or work is too hard
school or work isn't fun
people are rude or hurtful
not enough hours in the day to get everything done
not enough money
health issues
It could be anything - traffic, cars, lost items, the dog barking, the picture isn't hung straight...
Life is hard - how do we normally deal with stress and worry?
What are the unhealthy ways of coping with stress:
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You might think there is nothing you can do about your stress level. But there is. Let's look at how to deal with stress.
1. Give your burdens to God
- Matthew 11:28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
- Matthew 11:29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
o Spend time with Jesus. The result? Rest.
- Isa 48:17 This is what the LORD says - your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: "I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.
- Isa 48:18 If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea.
o Where does peace come from? Obedience.
Research shows that those who have a good relationship with God find greater relief from stress and enjoy better health and happier lives.
2. Put your burdens down for a while
Set them aside mentally and rest, before taking a look at them again.
How heavy is this glass of water?' The exact weight is not significant. The heaviness of the water depends on how long you try to hold it.
- If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.
- In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.'
That's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.
We need to realize and accept most burdens aren't going away overnight.
Take a break from them. Not only will it calm you, but it will give you a new perspective.
3. Avoid unnecessary stress
Not all stress can be avoided but you may be surprised by the number of stressors in your life that you can eliminate.
Learn how to say "no"
o Don't take on more than you can handle!
Avoid people who stress you out
o If someone consistently causes stress in your life and you can't turn the relationship around, limit the amount of time you spend with that person or end the relationship.
Take control of your environment
o If the news makes you stressed, turn the TV off. If traffic's got you tense, take a longer but less-traveled route. Or leave a little early to avoid rush hour.
Avoid hot-button topics
o If certain topics get you upset, don't talk about them. (politics) If you repeatedly argue about the same subject with the same people, stop bringing it up, change the subject, or walk away.
Manage your to-do list
o Write down your to-do list (e.g. Word doc)
o Prioritize it
o M/S/I
o Schedule your day
o Focus on one task at a time
o Eat the elephant one bite at a time
Learn what is really important in life and make time for it.
o Luke 10:38-42 Mary/Martha
Live by a budget.
o So many people struggle with financial problems. Develop a budget and live by it.
4. Alter the situation
Figure out what you can do to change things so the problem doesn't happen again.
- Express your feelings instead of bottling them up.
- Be willing to compromise.
- A rope only remains tight if both sides are still pulling.
- Matthew 7:4 How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?
- Be more assertive.
- Learn to delegate to others when you can.
If something or someone is bothering you, talk about your concerns in an open and respectful way. If you don't voice your feelings, resentment will build and the situation will likely remain the same.
Matthew 18:15 "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over.
Phil 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
When you ask someone to change their behavior, be willing to do the same.
Realistically examine yourself
Deal with problems head on. If you've got an exam to study for and your chatty roommate just got home, say up front that you only have five minutes to talk.
Moses' father in law's instruction Exodus 18:13-24 on delegating. "That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you."
5. Adapt to the problem
You can regain your sense of control by changing your attitude.
Rom 8:6 The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace;
- Look at the problem from a different perspective.
- Adjust your standards.
Rather than fuming about a traffic jam, look at it as an opportunity to pause and regroup, listen to your favorite radio station, or enjoy some alone time.
Look at the big picture.
Ask yourself how important it will be in the long run.
Use it as motivation.
Look at the position side.
Perfectionism is a major source of avoidable stress.
Set reasonable standards for yourself and others.
Allow less than standard to be okay.
Connect with positive people.
o A strong support system will help shield you from the effects of stress.
Take problems as opportunities for personal growth.
"What doesn't kill us makes us stronger."
Reflect on the situation and determine how to learn from your mistakes.
James 1:2 My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,
James 1:3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.
James 1:4 But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.
6. Accept the things you can't change
Acceptance may be difficult, but stressing over it adds nothing but more pain.
- Don't try to control the uncontrollable.
- Share your feelings.
- Learn to forgive.
Many things in life are beyond our control - particularly the behavior of other people. Focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to problems.
Phil 2:14 Do everything without complaining or arguing,
Phil 2:15 so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe
Talk to a trusted friend or family member. Expressing what you're going through can be very healing, even if there's nothing you can do to alter the stressful situation.
Prov 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Prov 18:24 ...there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
Accept the fact that we live in an imperfect world and that people make mistakes.
Let go of anger and resentments. Free yourself from bitterness & resentment by forgiving and moving forward.
Unforgiveness is a poison we drink hoping our enemy will die.
7. Make time for fun and relaxation
Taking care of yourself is a necessity, not a luxury. If you regularly make time for fun and relaxation, you'll be in a better able to handle life's stressors.
Eccl 3:1-4 a time to plant... a time to build, a time to laugh, ....and a time to dance,
Luke 5:16 But Jesus often withdrew to (private) places and prayed.
John 2:1-2 On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus' mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding.
Prov 17:22 A cheerful heart is good medicine,
Do something you enjoy every day! It's amazing what 10 minutes of that can do for you.
Put it on your schedule for the day.
Ways to relax and recharge:
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8. Adopt a healthy lifestyle
God wants us to take care of our bodies! It will reduce stress and help you sleep better.
1 Cor 6:19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;
1 Cor 6:20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
- Exercise regularly. Physical activity plays a key role in reducing the effects of stress.
- Eat a healthy diet.
- Reduce caffeine and sugar.
- Get enough sleep.
Well-nourished bodies are better prepared to cope with stress.
The temporary highs caffeine and sugar provide often end in with a crash in mood and energy.
It refuels your mind and body.
It help you to think clearly.
Psa 127:2 In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat-- for he grants sleep to those he loves.
Conclusion
1. Give your burdens to God
2. Put your burdens down for a while
3. Avoid unnecessary stress
4. Alter the situation
5. Adapt to the problem.
6. Accept the things you can't change
7. Make time for fun and relaxation
8. Adopt a healthy lifestyle
"CAST YOUR BURDEN ON THE LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved." (Psalm 55:22 ESV)
Remember: John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."